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-Infernal Affairs-

Deep within the Under where few dare to tread, a plated juggernaut of a lady stomps fiercely through the stone corridors of one the most treacherous domains within the demon realm, Gauntlet Hold. Here it is fairly common for well-planned attacks on the Overlord to fall to pieces. This particular group was no exception. The staunch paladin transmogrified into a chicken, the healers were on ice as the druid was frozen solid. A hand raked through and examined the pile of ashes that were once the party’s clever mage. The ashes rose through the air causing the examining figure to sneeze and blow it all over themselves.


All that was left of this party was a lone marauder. A nuisance that wouldn’t be too much of an ordeal for the great horned demon that resided within these castle walls.

The Marauder, Chloe, had certainly seen better days with her party and even though her legs felt like jelly, the fear of ending up with some horrible fate like the others kept her charging forward. She darted at every possible corridor that could be an exit and never stopped for too long before taking another turn through the maze-like halls. All the whole time there was a sound. Great heeled shoes clacking behind her. Whoever was chasing her was taking their time, they were aware that the halls ahead eventually ended in the same dead end. Chloe felt her sanity slipping, the halls became identical, had she been running in circles this whole time? It was hard to discern if the footsteps were growing louder as her own jostling armor deafened the sounds around her. She finally stopped to listen closely, silence?

Chloe gripped her great axe and held her breath, this silence was too good to be true. 

“You really can’t expect to lose me in my own home...”

Chloe let her axe do the talking and swung downward at the origin of the voice. Gnarled black barbs shot out from below the ground splitting and splintering the great battle axe in half. Chloe’s legs finally gave out from exhaustion and the powerful force.

“You see…” the figure revealing themselves as a pale gaunt woman,  she plucked a shard of wood out of her tidy white hair “I grow weary of your assassination attempts” She took a deep breath and smiled affably.

“..Which is why I must do away with each and every one of you.” 

Chloe shrieked defiantly but only to find her voice muted by a loud squish in her chest. She looked down and saw a black taloned claw pulling out a gooey ethereal substance. The view suddenly shifted into a fish eyed view and she saw her own body growing further away”.

“Tut tut..”

Chloe looked up at the now enormous demon woman. She rose before a jaggy ivory gate that clacked and parted

“You should have stayed home.”

The demon swallowed the gooey bulbous lump and stood up from Chloe’s lifeless body. She dusted herself off and picked at her teeth. She was still peckish and recalled the druid and paladin left in the main hallway. Cruxia took a step forward and caught the faint scent of a.. thurible? This was bad. she leapt back and attempted to defend herself but it was too late.

There was a brilliant white flash and suddenly pain sang through the demon. A sound of ripping flesh and spilling guts was drowned out by the sonorous hum of the glowing pole-arms that had suddenly shattered her form.. She wanted to scream but nobilities such as herself do not scream or shed tears. Instead she gritted her jagged teeth into unpleasant shapes and hissed. She was artfully skewered into that dead end, dark blood trickled off the weapons making plip plip sounds as they hit the floor in duets. Cruxia didn’t give her assailant the pleasure of pain she was in. With a calm dignified look she examined her glorified crucified state that could only be done by a very certain individual. 

“Getting straight to the point as usual.” 

She said dryly into the dark corridor and out from behind a corner stepped a pair of glittering gold greaves. Her response summoned forth a confident angelic host from the darkness who only laughed at the demon’s pitiful state.

“Cruxy! You haven’t changed much either!”

“...well actually…”

He knelt down in front of her, and hovered his hand over her head

“You’ve gotten a bit shorter”

Cruxia licked the blood off her teeth and simpered,

“It’s certainly easier to get through doors this way.”

Azrael smiled back and selectively yanked a spear from her body, Cruxia held back a wince.

“You should know I’m not here to kill you..” he walked a few steps away and hurled the spear between her horns. 


“However I do need you to do something for me, I’m not the type to meddle with occult magic, I mean look at me.” He snorted “I mean I can already feel sin crawling up my legs just standing in this grimy shit--

“What do you want.”

Azrael was pleased having successfully squeezed an emotion from her.

“I need you to find me an Infernal.”

“An Infernal Azrael?” She cackled, blood sputtering from her lips. “That’s quite a request!”

“You leatherbacks may only know the misery induced by Infernals but you see.. I have found a way to produce a renewable source of ether from the core.

Ether was a meaningless substance to her but it was invaluable to Celestians. She sneered at the absurdity of his request

“And why would I help you with that?”

He had hoped she would ask. 

“Or….” he began to twist a blade lodged in her ribs “I could warn everyone in Velur that the big bad overlord has had her minions kidnap children. That upsets people a lot. I add in that it's so you can eat them? Heck they'd fight to slay you at that point. Now THAT would make for some entertainment! 
She gritted her teeth at such an outlandish lie. She would never do something so barbaric. It was already bad enough they were coming here on a weekly basis to validate their self-worth. All she just wanted was some damn peace and quiet in her own abode. Of course those dimwitted outsiders would believe that farce without hesitation.

Cruxia closed her eyes, exhaled deeply, in a calm and dignified voice she responded.

“Very well Azrael. I’ll play your game.”

“Atta girl! I’ll be in touch with you soon!” He patted her head roughly and disappeared with a brilliant flash of light.

There was a brief silence and 
yet another flash of light that blinded her and he was back.

“Forgot something!”

Azrael palmed her chest with a luminous white light that caused a searing pain inside. Within moments a soul gurgled forth from her mouth. Disgusted, Azrael plucked the soul from her mouth and flicked the spittle and blood off.


Cruxia looked around,still pinned to the wall by the glimmering spears, blood rapidly staining her clothes, the thought of the remaining intruders having fled and she groaned wearily.
A short piece I wrote for some quick fun and to introduce a very special boy.    
YourBestClownFriend Featured By Owner Apr 20, 2017
Well! He seems nice.
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